Tag Archive for: relationships

Happy Mothers Day to Me!

I never had kids but I have functioned “maternally” in many people’s lives. (I’ve heard from a few of them this Mother’s Day weekend). While most celebrate the “biological” mom on this special day, I want to applaud the aunties, grandmothers, godmothers, adoptive moms, foster mothers, stepmothers, spiritual moms, neighbors, teachers, and others who have nurtured, mentored, counseled, sent money, supported with their presence, gave advice, taught the ways of God, confronted, corrected, and bridged the gap or void that the birth mom wasn’t able or willing to do. I salute you ALL! Thank all the birth moms who brought these special people into the world and gave us the opportunity to share God’s love with them.

Facing My Truth!

Women covering her eyesI received an email recently from one of my readers who confessed that she is having a problem with “jealousy” in a particular relationship. She wanted to be honest with herself about it. I gave her my input but marveled at God’s timing because, only a few days before, I too had decided to face the TRUTH about a certain issue.

You see, I’ve been on a diet since Jesus ascended into the Heavens (or it seems like it!). Some time ago, I went on an pricey program and lost noticeable weight but when I saw it was creeping back, I went into denial and stopped weighing myself. I just didn’t want to go on another strict plan because it is so inconvenient to our busy lifestyle—and I hate high protein/low carb eating (which really works for me; vegetarian eating makes me gain weight).

Well, I had my annual physical last week. I closed my eyes when the nurse weighed me so that I couldn’t see what the scale registered. I dared her to tell me.

However, the next morning, I decided to face the Truth—who is always a Friend and Motivator. I looked at my medical visit summary and although I didn’t like what I saw, I kept my joy. I reminded myself of all the blessings and favor I have in my life. I’m active (more than most in my age bracket) and can walk several miles at a good clip. I’m not on ANY medication for ANYTHING. Plus, I’m saved, sane, and a productive member of society, impacting the world with my gift of writing and pointing people to the Word. I have a great, long-term (39-yr) marriage and great relationships with my family (well, MOST of ’em) and in-laws.

NOW ALL THAT IS FINE AND DANDY, BUT I STILL HAVE NOT ACHIEVED FITNESS! UGGGGH!!!!

As a public speaker, I have to live with the reality that people LOOK at women before they LISTEN to them. {Actually, in some environments, a little extra weight makes a woman more “relatable” as the audience identifies with her struggle. Wonderful–but that’s not my goal.}  Now, being a Joy Fanatic and not one to stay in the dumps for more than a few seconds, I asked myself, “What now?” I re-committed to taking practical steps to conquering this giant—without sacrificing too much quality of life. I’m not going to be obsessive, but I’ll continue my fight for fitness. By the grace of God, I will consistently drink 64-80 oz of water per day, engage in some form of exercise 5x a week for 30-45 minutes, eat less, and GET BED AT A DECENT HOUR (the main problem in my case).

So, my friends, if you have been in denial about any aspect of your life, I say decide NOW to make TRUTH your friend. We have the ULTIMATE HELPER—the Holy Spirit who guides us into ALL TRUTH (John 16:13) and empowers us to do what we have to do. STAY IN THE GAME; VICTORY IS OURS.

My Most Eventful Month of the Decade!

Forgive,-Let-Go,-and-Live_bI hope that you’ve all had a great summer. August has been an eventful month for me.

On August 1, my new book,  Forgive, Let Go, and Live,  was released by Harvest House Publishers. I’m really excited about its potential to free people who are stuck in their story of hurt and offense. Here is a capsule of some of the key content:
• 25 Real Stories of the Tragedy of Revenge and the Triumph of Forgiveness
• 10 Signs That It’s Time to Let Go of a Hurtful Relationship
• A 12-Step Mini Program for Forgiveness
• 5 Rewards of Letting Go of an Offense
• 20 Scripture-based Prayers to Release Specific Hurts and Offenses

It is so critical that we guard our peace of mind and make every effort to have harmonious relationships in the various circles of our lives. Nothing gets accomplished without people.  You may read an excerpt and purchase the book at Amazon.com (https://goo.gl/dG761w) –or if you insist on wanting an autographed copy, order it from my website: www.ConfrontingIssues.com.

The second weekend in August, I traveled to Orlando, Fl for the culmination of my training to become an independent, certified John Maxwell Leadership Coach! I’m delighted to be associated with John and his team. He has been named the number one leadership guru in the world. John has set the bar pretty high and by the grace of God, I’ll try to keep it there. I plan to conduct corporate masterminds, seminars, and other gatherings primarily around the issue of connecting effectively with people and adding value to their lives.

Finally, on August 15, I was delighted to participate in the commencement ceremony of Next Dimension University, a private accredited Bible college on a mission to stamp out biblical illiteracy. They awarded me an honorary doctorate in Theology along with gospel greats Yolanda Adams, Fred Hammond, and others who are making a difference in the world. And no, you don’t have to call me Dr. Deborah!

I pray that you are pursuing your God-ordained purpose and being fulfilled in every way. Don’t be a victim to procrastination or fear—and for goodness sake, don’t wait until you feel “totally qualified” to step out on faith. Know that God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all that you could ask or think—according to the power that works IN YOU (Ephesians 3:20). Be blessed and thanks for being a part of my “tribe”.

A RANT AGAINST CELL PHONE ADDICTION

 I try to keep rants to a minimum. However, I have a great burden to see people behave properly (i.e., considerately) towards others because it makes for higher quality relationships and works to their advantage in the long run. So to “cut to the chase”, here is a gentle reminder that the following behaviors are simply unacceptable:1) Texting/Talking while socializing with others. Ever thought about what it says to the person you are with? “You are not that significant to me. You are secondary to whomever I’m texting.” HEY FOLKS, PEOPLE LIKE TO BE WITH PEOPLE WHO MAKE THEM FEEL SPECIAL.2) Texting while sharing ANY activity with another person who is TREATING you or PLANNED the activity sends this message: “I’m not that interested in this. I’m not that appreciative or respectful of the time or effort you are taking to spend with me.” JUST STOP THE SELFISHNESS, OKAY?Yes, there are times when an emergency requires an immediate response. But, every call is NOT an emergency. This addiction is real folks and it’s time to address it. Here are a couple of suggestions that may help:

1) Silence your phone during your time with others and don’t answer it unless it’s an emergency. 2) Try muting the phone in general and only checking it once an hour or so (unless you have dependent kids or you are a doc on call). 3) phone textingAdmit that your phone has become an idol in your life and ask God to deliver you from this addiction. Here’s how the psalmist prayed against things becoming a stronghold in his life:

“Direct my steps by Your word, And let no iniquity have dominion over me.”
Psalms 119:133 NKJV {NOTE: “iniquity” means any injustice or inequality”}. I’M PRAYING THIS BIG TIME IN EVERY AREA OF MY LIFE.